My Poetic Journal of Life's Daily Experiences and a Deeper and More Mindful Side of Me. You all are my life's inspiration. You create the emotions inside me that pour out onto this page.
Thursday, August 21, 2003
On my way to the city of lights.
Taken this flight but only can think of you...
The boy at home left behind that makes my nerves shrill
More than any flashy thrill this city holds.
More fun to sit and think of you... that silly guy I wish I knew.
Do I dare to think that I've broke through
Because I still don't fill that connected to you.
But what we share is a glimpse of something else.
Not necessarily our true selves,
But not the ones we knew before.
And we'll ignore the inappropriateness of that night...
The touch, the dance, the alcohol.
Thoughts of better and worse both exposed.
And I don't know if either of us are ready to accept both sides.
It's too early for me to see those flaws and worry. But I do.
And I don't know what excites me so
When you come walking through that door.
So nervous and shy I can't even look at you.
I haven't really seen you for so long now.
So caught up in my fear of being rejected by you.
Not by anyone or everyone, just by you.
You give me a happiness just in liking you and I won't risk losing that.
So I don't take risks. I play it safe and keep my platonic front.
Not even to give an inch of encouragement when you think of making that move.
So scared am I to figure out that you don't care for me.
